Dumbest thing you've ever heard someone say about synths

[Mr Knesh]

I worked at GC for 3 years and what that guy was doing, not hitting on your gf, was what GC calls "leading questions." These questions are made with intention of leading toward a sale. This salesman entered into the keyboard department and looked to the easiest sale first. The knob tweaking grunt over at the microkorg as he was the most likely to buy something. That's not sexism, that is straight statistical data, and no Guitar Center doesn't teach you that, being a salesman teaches you that.
After you brush the guy off like a douche, he then turned his attention to his next sale. A tasty motif. Which is a great sale, but it is really difficult to begin talking about without sounding like a total j**k-off. So was trying to lead into a conversation about the motif by complimenting her playing.
It sounded like he was doing the usual salesman routine, not hitting on your gf brody. AND DON'T TOUCH THE SALESMAN ITS CREEPY AS f**k AND FRANKLY THREATENING!!!

[Primal Drive]

Fair enough. Thanks for your input JayEm and My Knesh. There was quite a bit more dialog that went on that I omitted in my post. I too have worked in sales many years ago and based upon my own experience this individual came across as smarmy and overbearing while displaying a lack of understanding of the products he was trying to sell. If he had any knowledge of the product he was trying to sell he would have understood when I explained to him what I was trying to program in the synth rather than to come up with such idiotic comments.

As for me placing my hand on his shoulder, yes, it was intended to creep the dude out. Call it an old fashioned caveman-esque response if you will to my girlfriend being hit upon by some other guy (in all fairness, I realize that some may find the idea of a three way with a music store sales person enticing, so I'll refrain from any sort of judgmental comments).

Honestly, the guy was an a*s and his comments fit this thread.

[Mr Knesh]

Old man 1 - "You had a three way with my daughter!"
Old man 2 - "You daughter is 58 years old!"
Old man 1 - "That is no excuse for such behavior."
Old man 3 - "You know the rules, if there is snow on the field, plow it from both ends!"

[D-Collector]

No disrespect, but if there is no ring on her finger hitting on her is fair game.

That is a bold statement and may cost you a lot of teeth in the long term...

But you live by the sword and die by the sword.

[nvbrkr]

Well, he was already programming the synth, so it's pretty dumb nevertheless to tell him that he doesn't have to do that as the unit also has presets. Then again, music stores these days won't need the most knowledgeable personnel in there, since those who know what they are getting most often buy their stuff via internet. I think at least around here the keyboard sections in the bigger stores survive merely by making their sales to people who walk into the store and can't really tell the difference between a rompler / va / home keyboard with built-in speakers. It's probably better that they won't confuse the customer's head with the typical geargeek stuff.

Sometimes you may absolutely need to flirt with the middle-aged women in order to make a sale, though.

[adamstan]

I've once read a Polymoog review (around 1999). It was quite nice, but one statement made me laughing. Reviewer said, that you shouldn't expect realistic acoustic sounds from analogue synth, 'cause it isn't digital And that's it - no further explanation. Just "analogue isn't digital, and that's why it sucks at making acoustic sounds".

[b3groover]

I can't remember how many times an anonymous person at a gig has referred to my Leslie cabinet as a "Wurlitzer".

[loungedumore]

Not sure if this has been said before as I have not read all 16 pages , but a few years back I was working at a GC and well 90% of the things I heard said in there could make this thread go on forever .
One that stands out in my mind as I was asked it so often it became an inside joke was ...
" Do you got them audio to midi cables ? "
The what ?
" you know for the midis " ( some times followed by a )
" so I can record my voice in to Reasons "
Reas-on ( I would then like to emphasize the n ) Doesn't record audio .
" I know that's why I need a midis cord for my mic "
I would then after my eyes glazing over question weather the hosa snakes would hold long enough to hang me completely " So you would then say to your co-worker I got to go back in the stock room to look through the hosa cables .

[pflosi]

that is awesome! reminds me of guys referring to midi as "sounding" special
"you know, midi just sounds s**t"

[loungedumore]

that is awesome! reminds me of guys referring to midi as "sounding" special
"you know, midi just sounds s**t"

I know . A friend of mine I've been thinking about working with said ' "I hate the sound of midi drums " after telling him I would bring my Alesis control pad with me on our next meeting . I then asked him how he did the the drum tracks from his last demo ? He stated he did them in Garageband with the built in instruments using the mac keyboard , "but thats why they sounded so good because they weren't midi "
( note he is a brilliant song writer and guitarist , but obviously has no clue about anything electronic )

Anyway glad my own personal misery can give others something to chuckle about


Now where did I put my proco snake .That will work ....

[Cumulus]

that is awesome! reminds me of guys referring to midi as "sounding" special
"you know, midi just sounds s**t"

I know . A friend of mine I've been thinking about working with said ' "I hate the sound of midi drums " after telling him I would bring my Alesis control pad with me on our next meeting . I then asked him how he did the the drum tracks from his last demo ? He stated he did them in Garageband with the built in instruments using the mac keyboard , "but thats why they sounded so good because they weren't midi "
( note he is a brilliant song writer and guitarist , but obviously has no clue about anything electronic )

Anyway glad my own personal misery can give others something to chuckle about


Now where did I put my proco snake .That will work ....

I can only assume he meant that playing the drums manually via the Mac keyboard sounds better than the pre-programmed patterns. It still sounds dumb, though.

[Cumulus]

I used to play music with a guy who swore that my drum machine couldn't keep a steady beat. he swore that it sped up or slowed down because he couldn't keep a steady beat.

[tallowwaters]

Somewhere on the internet, I can only hope that somebody is making fun of each one of you for saying something ignorant about fruit fly mating habits, fluid dynamics, dental prosthetics, reports on atavism, having a clue about the opposite sex, etc.

[Mr Knesh]

that is awesome! reminds me of guys referring to midi as "sounding" special
"you know, midi just sounds s**t"

He might have also been referring to midi sound fonts, or merely the general midi soundset which was simply called midi for a long time.

and hosa cables are very strong. I use them to m*******e with.

[loungedumore]

and hosa cables are very strong. I use them to m*******e with.

No it had more to do with the fact that I mentioned the word " MIDI " and he explained to me latter that it wasn't an apple instrument he used , but samples and he dropped them in one hit at a time ... so since it took longer and had less flexibility and did not come from a midi track or plugin it was better .... somehow
Lesson learned : Just do your magic without explanation ! If the kids don't know there's anchovies in the dressing they will eat it and like it ,but if you tell them .... not so much .